spa bonita

Punk and Kooka gave me a treat today . . . a trip to "Spa Bonita."

Ever heard of it? It's right next to "Fitness Club" - remember that place? There is no danger of severing your ACL, but the lack of sanitary practices at Spa Bonita, could leave you with a good case of pink eye.

Spa Bonita is run by a cutthroat manager, who sprints through your home shouting, "makeovers - two bucks!" When you tell him you don't have two bucks and ask for a family discount, he puts his hands on his hips, and says, "Listen lady - you don't have two lousy dollars? This is not a charity . . . we are trying to make a living."

The chairs in Spa Bonita are 3 sizes too small, and they demand payment up front. First there is the manicure service - purple sparkly nail polish. The stylist works very hard, while the manager sits at the table counting sheckles on his very loud and obnoxious cash register. It is not until he hears that stylists earn tips for their work, that he decides to pitch in with the creative process.

Next is hair styling - I choose the Hawaian look - finger combed hair with a pink flower tucked in my ear. Kooka applies natural blush while Manager Punk, smears my eyelids with creamy white shadow. I can actually see the dirt under his nails as he continually pokes me in the eye and mutters "whoops."

There is lipstick applied, accessories chosen - but the best part is when the sylist goes into your closet for you and picks a new outfit. Not only does she tell you what would look fabulous, but she is quick to point out what doesn't. ("I have always hated this shirt" she says.) She settles on a silky pink number, and tells me to change.

I walk back into the spa - met with appraising looks from both Punk and Kooka - and pronounced "beautiful." At which point Punk says, "not that you NEEDED a makeover - you were always beautiful, " . . . thereby earning his tip.

The makeover isn't bad . . . I'm just afraid they're gonna open a smoothie shop or a tanning salon next.